Intersecting Needs: Maslow, interdependence, parenting, caregiving, relationships
| 
We all have needs. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs provides an excellent framework to describe the relative importance of different needs. I like Meagan Francis (The Happiest Mom)’s Mother’s Hierarchy of Needs and I enjoyed putting together my Child’s Hierarchy of Needs . The problem though, with each of them, is that they focus on one person’s needs. They do not look explicitly at how that person’s needs intersect with the needs of others. Almost all of us will take on a caregiving role at some point in our lives, whether we are caring for our children, our parents, our spouse or another friend or family member. We will all be involved in relationships with others that require us to sometimes consider the needs of others before our own.
“No (wo)man is an island”The phrase “ ” is based on the concept that human beings do not thrive when isolated from others . This is true. But it could also equally be held to mean that human beings cannot selfishly pursue their own needs all of the time. They need to help others meet their needs too, whether that is by directly helping them (e.g. feeding an infant) or providing them with the space to do so (e.g. giving a tired mom time and space to have a bath).
So where does this leave a frazzled, exhausted mother with a screaming, tired and hungry baby?
In short – she needs help. Children in general, and babies in particular, are very dependent on adults to meet their basic needs. Parents are the are the ones who are primarily responsible for meeting the child’s needs and that can sometimes get in the way of parents meeting their own needs. The more a parent feels pressure to meet all of those needs on their own, without the support of a partner or other friends and family, the more danger they are in of neglecting their own needs or neglecting those of their child. The need for help goes beyond raising a child. It also extends to caregiving of older relatives or family members with disabilities.
...
AP's and adoptees...child in need of special care?
Hi,
My sister is asking for some information about resources for foreign adoptees in need of special therapy/treatment.
My sister's student is 8 years old, and is the oldest of three siblings adopted from Russia. She was adopted after the younger two, once the AP's realized that the younger two had an older sister. According to the AP's, the child was left in isolation for much of her infant and toddler years, and was adopted at around 5-6 years old. She is in the right grade level, but has no interest in school or much of anything. The school has done testing on her, and say she has a low IQ. They have said that there is nothing the AP can do to help her daughter. The child talks and reads on grade level, but is behind all of the other children in social skills, in comprehension of things she learns. She is extremely close to her Adoptive mother, but is very wary of strangers and new situations.
I honestly don't know much more than what I have given you, but the AP's are concerned because they don't know what to do to help her. I questioned why they are just now seeking help, but they said that there weren't many warning signs prior to the 2nd grade.
My question is, do any of you know websites, facilities, etc. to help IA children with treatment, support, etc.? I'm not looking for an online forum, but an actual program or service. Apparently, these people are not hurting for money, and are willing to do anything it takes to help this child....but I just don't know much about IA and the transition issues, developmental issues, etc. Thanks for any help you could provide!
She is located in South Carolina...sorry, I forgot to mention that.
Kim, thank you SO much! The place in Charleston sounds promising. I will let her do some research on it!
It is very difficult to tell from what you've posted whether these issues are specifically tied to the child's adoption, or if she would have learning issues regardless of her background. So it's difficult to know if she needs adoption-related resources, or just learning-related ones. But assuming she needs adoption-related resoucres...
Many children's hospitals have "International Adoption Clinics" with doctors who specialize in the health and developmental issues of international adoptees. These hospitals often offer consultations and assessments and can refer families to appropriate counseling/treatment services if necessary.
I know that the University of Minnesota's program is one of the oldest, and is well respected. However, I noticed that there is also an International Adoption Clinic at MUSC in Charleston, SC. (I don't know anything about that one, so she might want to do some research on it before she decides, but... it might be a starting place since it's closer to home.)
Child Care & First Aid : How to Treat an Infant's Cold
Treating an infant's cold usually can be done at home if the baby does not develop a high fever. Clearing the baby's nose, giving him or ...
auto lite starter Directory
Information for parents who are trying to choose child care.
This article describes the different types of care options available for people in need of care for a child with special needs.
Infants need special feeding care. Parents and child care providers must work closely to ensure consistent care in this most important growth period. ...
Infancy is generally the period from birth until age two years. It is a time of a lot of growth and change for children and families.
Family foster care homes in Rice County provide a wide range of child care services for ... All children in foster care need special help from their foster ...